


This Never Meant Nothin' To Ya'

by motorbaby_coffee



Category: Black Parade (Album), Frank Iero - Fandom, Gerard Way - Fandom, Mikey Way - Fandom, My Chemical Romance, ferard - Fandom, frerard - Fandom, ray toro - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Frerard, M/M, MCR, MCRmy - Freeform, Multi, My Chem
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-04
Updated: 2017-06-01
Packaged: 2018-10-28 03:01:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 11,884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10822362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/motorbaby_coffee/pseuds/motorbaby_coffee
Summary: FRERARD! It has always been an unspoken truth between Frank Iero and Gerard way that they loved each other. What Gerard doesn't know, is that Frank is IN LOVE with him. Will frank build up the nerve to tell his best friend before he gets married to his two month girlfriend? Whose happiness will he sacrifice? His, or that of the man he loves? Black Parade era.*TRIGGER WARNING!* alcohol, self harm, sexual themes





	1. Go On Live Your Life

Frank's POV

The disturbing thoughts swirled around in my head. My best friend... the man I love, is getting married.

Gerard knows I love him and I know he loves me too, but he's IN LOVE with LynZ. It had always been an unspoken truth between me and Gerard that we loved each other but I don't think Gerard knows I'm IN LOVE with him. It was hard for me to accept at first. I thought I was straight, but then Gerard came into my life. The moment I met him I felt a spark between us, but I guess he didn't .Gerard loves me the way a friend loves there best friend. The kind of love I have for him is unexplainable, the only thing I know for certain is that I can't do without him.

I wish LynZ had never come into our lives. We met her a long time ago and the truth is, I actually like her. I wish it was easier to hate her. But really Gerard?! Two months?!

I got up from my bunk and stormed out of the bunk room, grabbing the arm of my silver haired best friend who was watching TV. He looked baffled but I guess he saw the sad look in my eyes and so he followed me off the tour bus and into the parking lot. I could feel the 3 pairs of eyes, belonging to our other band mates, staring at me as I led him outside.

"What's this about Frank?" He asked me.

"I need to talk to you Gee." I sat on a curb and pulled out a pack of cigarettes before offering him one and lighting them for us both.

"Ok, what is it?" I looked at the ground, a sullen look on my face as he sat down next to me.

"You're my best friend Gee, but... are you happy?"

"What do you mean Frankie?" God I love it when he calls me Frankie.

"It's just not like you to... I dunno, fall in love and want to get married at all, let alone so soon. Common Gee, what's up? You only started dating her two months ago. Please just tell me what's happening?" he sighs.

"Frankie, I'm sorry if you feel like I've been blocking you out. The truth is... I've just been having problems. Y'know, problems that I've had in the past. The depression is coming back, the need to drink, I-I've been having a hard time keeping off the pills, things like that. But you are my best friend and I really am sorry if I haven't been acting like it." I smile a little knowing that I haven't lost him completely.

"But Gee, why didn't you tell anybody you were having problems? And if you aren't happy, then why are you getting married?" I was getting a little teary eyed now at the idea of him sinking back into old habits.

"That's the thing Frankie, when I'm with LynZ, I am happy. She makes me happy. And... she makes me not want to um... do that stuff to myself." That hit me hard. It made me sad to think that LynZ could do that for him and I couldn't. Though I hate to admit it, I would do anything if it meant Gerard being happy. My breathing is shaky but I manage to let out a sigh that doesn't sound like I'm about to cry. I stand up.

"Alright, Gee. That's all I needed. I just want you to be happy." I drop my cigarette to the ground and stomp on it. "Promise you'll tell me everything from now on?"  
"Yeah, I promise. I shouldn't have kept this from you."

"It's okay." It's not okay.


	2. Sure, I'm okay.

I'm still kind of sulky. I'm not trying to be, but it's kind of hard to be happy. Even if it's for my best friend. 

We have been traveling since last night but now I can feel the bus take a turn and then lurch to a stop. I pop my head up from where it was resting on the table and look out the window. We have appeared to have stopped in the parking lot of a medium sized arena. Yay. Another night of watching Gerard dance and show off, knowing I can't have him.

He's sitting across the table from me and as I lay my head back down, he takes a drink from his water bottle.

"Hey, we're going into town. You wanna come?" Ray asked gestering to himself, Mikey and Bob.

"No thanks, I'm gunna stay here and watch a movie" Gerard said.

"Yeah, me too." I hadn't watched a movie with Gerard in a while. We used to do it all the time. I just wish we could go back to the times when Gerard wasn't dating LynZ and I didn't have to try so hard not to straddle his hips and start making out with him. The temptation is strong.

After the guys had left, Gerard grabbed his water bottle and went to choose a movie to watch. He put one in the player and "The Conjuring" started playing. He sat down on the couch and I went over and sat down next to him.

About halfway through the movie, Gerard told me he had to pee so he paused the movie. I waited patiently for him to come back. My mind wandered to my own desires. I thought about Gerard. Gerard's perfect hair, Gerard's perfect body, Gerard's perfect hands, Gerard's perfect lips. His lips are perfect. He always tastes really good to. Of course I haven't kissed him since the beginning of the Black Parade tour. We are now toward the end of Black Parade. But, he is a really good kisser. I really miss the taste of his lips. 

I turn my head to where he was sitting before and my eyes lock onto his water bottle that he left laying on the couch seat. I remember how he is always squemish about other people germs on his stuff and I start giggling. I grab the water bottle and as I'm screwing the top off, Gerard walks out of the bathroom. 

"Frank! Don't! Stop!" He pleads as I take a gulp of the clear liquid. My eyes widen in horror. Well, it is clear liquid, but it sure as hell isn't water!

"G-Gerard, this isn't water."

"I know." He hangs his head. 

"This is Vodka Gerard. I thought you were better than this! You know you have a problem!" 

"I know! I'm sorry! It... It helps with- you know how it is.

"You can't just drink away your problems Gee! You've proved that to yourself before."

"You- Your right. I'm sorry. I'll stop." He says in resignation. 

"Good! I'm not going to have you screw up your life again right after you just got it sorted out." I cross to the kitchen sink and pour out the liquid. Then, after watching to make sure he sits back down instead of searching for more alcohol, I go lay down in my bunk, hoping I can get a nap in before the show tonight. 

"You won't tell anybody, right?" Gerard calls from the living room.  


"You won't do it again, right?" I call back. I hear a mumbled "yeah" from his direction. Thank God!  


I hate the idea that my best friend and love is hurting. Tears start leaking out the corners of my eyes. The things he said yesterday made me think that he was going to be okay. Gerard has always been far from okay. 

"I'm happy" my ass.


	3. Slipping

Tonight's show was horrible. At least for me it was. I was forced to put myself through the motions and pretend that I was okay. My brain doesn't even know what to do anymore. Sometimes I think that I have to fake being okay for Gerard's sake but then again, he himself is not okay. Other times, I feel like I need to do something. He said that he's happy with LynZ, but he still has self-destructive thoughts. The one thing I never want to happen is for him to go back to his old habits. He broke his sobriety. That hurt like a knife in the back. When Gerard got clean, it was because he knew that he was ruining his life with his bad habits and he didn't want to drag the band down with him. It wasn't just an addiction. Yes, he was addicted to alcohol, pills and cocaine. But what kept him there so long was his own self-loathing. Gerard's depression has always been an issue for him. The pills he took were the same ones that made it possible for him to carry on each day. There were many nights where the band members would take turns staying up with him to make sure he didn't try to kill himself like he had told us he wanted to. We knew about everything he ever did. We forced it out of him if we couldn't see it for ourselves. We could see the empty pill bottles, the beer cans that littered to floor, the marks left by razor blades. And now, as the scars that cover his arms fade, he's slipping.

That is the hardest part for me. 

Gerard, the love of my life, the man who saved himself, not only for his own sake, but for the sake of the people he loved, is hurting again. 

Why does Gerard want to marry LynZ so suddenly? Does she really make him feel better? Does she know about Gerard? About his past and about what's happening now? I need to find LynZ. I need to talk to her. She can't be far. The wedding's tomorrow.

I wander in and out of the parked vehicles until I find the one I've been looking for. I walk up the steps of the "Mindless Self Indulgence" tour bus that has been following us since Gerard's proposal and knock on the door. It is several moments before it opens and a male figure appears.

"Hello? Is that you Frank? What's up?" He says.

"I was just hoping that I could have a talk with LynZ. Is she awake?" He gives me a strange look because it is, like 2 AM. 

"She actually just went to bed, I think I get her up if you really need her though."

"Yeah, it's kind of important." He nods and disappears. A few moments later, LynZ shows up at the door wrapped in a bath robe. She smiles at me. 

"Hey Frank! What did you need at 2AM?" I can see why Gerard loves her, she is a happy person to be around. Always lightening the mood, she did seem an ideal match for him. But I still had to tell her. I can't let Gerard go into a marriage with a woman that doesn't know the whole story.

"We really need to talk LynZ. It's about Gee." I say with resignation. Her face becomes serious and she looks behind her to check that we are alone before shutting the door and descending the steps.

"Before you say anything Frank, I promise that I won't hurt-"

"He's already hurt." I cut her off. I know that it's rude but I'm not really in the mood for playing around. She gets a hurt and slightly confused look on her face.

"What do you mean?" 

"Listen LynZ, there are things that Gerard's to scared to tell anybody. The only reason me and the rest of the band know is because we were there during them. Don't feel bad because he didn't tell you, he loves you and he wants you to feel good around him but I can't let this marriage happen without you knowing. Please, oh God! Don't get mad at him! If you love him, you will understand." She leans against a tree in stunned silence. I take a deep breath. "Okay, I'll start at the beginning." 

I told her everything. Everything from the depression that started the band to my awful discovery earlier today. I told her about the pills, the alcohol, the drugs, the cutting, even the suicide attempts. The last thing I told her though, was about what Gerard said. He said that she made things better. 

"LynZ, I don't know why he's slipping. But I'm really fuckin' scared. You didn't know about any of this did you?" I am in tears now and I can see that she is close to the same. "I'm sorry if I kind of just threw this on you last minute, but I just had to tell you. You had to know." I pause to calm myself. "Gerard loves you. I can see it in his eyes when he talks about you." I say, remembering our talk from yesterday. "Gerard means the world to me, and you mean the world to him. I want you guys to be happy. It makes me happy when you guys are happy." After about an hour of talking about Gerard's dark past and impending future, Me and LynZ are sitting side by side on the grass and quietly crying together.

"I had my suspicions Frank. Thank you for telling me. I know that was hard for you. You love him don't you?" I stiffen and she goes to hug me, which I return after processing what she had just said.

"God yes! I love him so much LynZ! I need him! I need him to live! But I can't save him. You are the only one who can save him this time LynZ! He needs you! Not me! Not Mikey! Not anybody else!" I am bawling my eyes out uncontrollably. LynZ clings to my shaking form and rubs my back, making soothing sounds with her mouth. When I am calmed down enough to talk I pull away. "You have to save him LynZ. I need you to do that for me."

"I'll do it for all of us Frank. I will take care of him." She says with determination in her voice.

"Good. Because He's not okay."

\-----

I managed to avoid making a sound as I opened the door to our tour bus. I really just wanted to go to sleep. Today had left me emotionally and physically drained. Before heading to my bunk, I decide to wash my face in the bathroom but when I reach the door, I find that it is occupied. Wondering who else is up at 3:30 AM, I quickly check all the bunks. Of course. It's fucking Gerard. 

A little alarm goes off in my head and I know that something bad is happening behind that door. I reach for the door nob and pull the door open with no effort. He forgot to lock it. I stare in silence at the scene before me. Gerard is looking in the mirror with his back to me, but I know that he can see me in the reflection. His eyes are wide at the surprise of being caught. I look down to see what he was doing before I opened the door. He started doing it again. He started cutting again.

There are several dark red lines on his arm and he is holding a razor blade in his other hand. I take a deep shuttering breath before holding my hand out, palm up. He takes the hint and drops the blade into my hand. There is still blood on it.

"Is that all, Gerard?" I whisper in pissed off tone. He closes his eyes and nods his head. I turn to my bunk and grab a book that I had finished reading a few day s ago. Opening it up in the middle and placing the bloody razor blade inside, I close the book again and shove it into a hole between my mattress and the wall. 

I turn back to Gerard who is still standing in the bathroom. I stare at him for a few moments, a blank look on my face, before hugging him. Thankfully, he hugs me back. 

"I'm sorry Frankie." he whispers.

"If you're sorry, you won't do it again." He sniffs and nods. "Lets just get you cleaned up." I say. 

By the time his wounds are clean and he has finally gone to bed, it is a little past 4 AM. I crawl into my bunk without changing because I don't have the strength left.

I want to sleep but the same thing that kept me awake last night is doing the same tonight.

Gerard is not okay. 


	4. Demolition Lovers

I'm shaken awake by Mikey. I groggily look up at him and shove my face back into my pillow with a groan. I had hardly gotten any sleep.

"What time is it Mikey?" I say.

"Its 9 o'clock Frank, you should get up if you want breakfast." I shake my head with my face still buried in my pillow. "Okay fine but Gerard made pancakes." It catches my attention that Gerard made my favorite breakfast the morning after I caught him cutting and 2 days after i discovered him drinking again. Well, you know what? Fuck you Gerard. I'm not ready to forgive you yet.

"I'll eat later Mikey! Please just let me sleep!"

"Alright, I'll wake you up again later." He leaves as I drift off to sleep again.

********************************

"Is something wrong Frankie? You never sleep this late." Ray asks as I drag myself into the main room of our tour bus. I shake my head and go for the coffee pot. "Don't give me that Frank. I know when something is wrong with my friends." Mikey is looking at me too. I notice that Bob and Gerard aren't here.

"Where did Gerard and Bob go?" I ask, trying to change the subject. I know that as soon as they start prying for information on why I'm so tired and why I'm so sad right now, I'll just break down into tears again.

"Bob is out talking to Brian and Gerard is out with LynZ." He sets his coffee mug down. "but don't change the subject Frank. What's wrong?"

"There's nothing wrong with me." I say, panic rising in my chest.

"Don't think we haven't noticed you moping around and not being able to sleep." he says in a threatening tone. "Now spill before I sit on you and hold you down until you talk." I know he would. Ray would do anything to help a friend, even if it looks more like torture than help. I sigh and put my head down on the table. Looks like I'm going to have to do this.

"Ray... I really just... I don't know. I just don't know if I want people to know." I say, I know that isn't good enough for them. What if they tell Gerard what I say?

"It's okay Frank. Whatever it is, we love you. You can tell us. We want to help." Mikey says at my side. I take a shuttering breath.

"I know but... you really can't help. The only person that could help is Gerard."

"Well lets get Gerard then." Ray says.

"No!" My head shoots up. "He can't know!" I slowly put my head down again.

"Frank, You're really confusing us now. If Gerard is the only one that can help, why can't he know. And I don't know why it has to be Gerard either. We're all friends here." He pauses and it seems to dawn on him. "Wait, it's about him isn't it?" I sigh and nod.

"Well, is it something he did?" Mikey asks. I'm really nervous having Mikey here because he and Gee and brothers and best friends.

"It's two things he did... and one thing he's going to do." I say with my head still buried in my arms.

"What did he do Frank?" Ray asks again.

"Do you remember two days ago when you guys went into town and me and Gee stayed here to watch a movie?" They both nod. "Well, I promised him I wouldn't tell, but while he was in the bathroom, I took a drink of his water bottle and, it wasn't water. He was drinking vodka." They both gasp.

"What?! Why would he do that?!"

"I don't know. But he promised he wouldn't do it again." I lie, of course I know why he did it but I just don't have the energy to explain it. They relax a little bit.

"Well, he is an alcoholic. I've heard that it's normal to relapse. I guess we just have to watch him." Mikey says. He's kind of sensitive to this because he's had problems before too. Another reason why I was nervous to have him here.

"Okay, you said there was two things he's done?"

"Yeah, the other one was last night at about 3:30 in the morning. That's why I'm so tired. I caught him. I saw a light under the bathroom door and i got a really bad feeling and I decided that I better check on him so I opened the door and found him doing something I had hoped he would never do again. He- he was cutting!" It takes a lot of strength to say the last sentence. I feel Mikey tense up at my side and I hear a sharp intake of breath come from Ray. He groans.

"There really is something wrong with him then." Ray says shaking his head. "Has he talked to you Frank?"

"Yeah, it was like 3 days ago though. He's depressed again and, and he said that he's been having a hard time staying sober and staying off the pills and drugs."

"I wonder why he's depressed?" Mikey wondered.

"Do you need a reason to depressed? I just wish he would talk to us or LynZ or somebody." Ray laid emphasis on the last word.

"Yeah, that's the thing. Last night, the reason I caught him was because I was out. I knew something was wrong with him and I knew he needs someone to save him so I went and talked to LynZ. I told her everything. I'm not sure that I should have but I did because now that she's going to be marrying him she's going to have to take care of him."

"What exactly do you mean when you say you told her everything? And why is she the one that's going to have to save him?" Ray responded.

"I mean that I told her about Gerard's past. I was surprised that he hadn't told her himself but she needed to know. And we haven't been able to do it so far, what makes you think that we can save him now? LynZ understands. She loves him and he really needs her." They seemed to believe me. I left out the part about LynZ making him not want to be self-destructive because then they would want to know why he was still being self-destructive. I don't have an answer for that.

"I guess we will have to let LynZ handle it then. That's probably why she came to get him this morning."

"Yeah, probably" mumbled Mikey. "But Frank, you said there was also something he hasn't done yet? What did you mean by that? Did he tell you something else?"

"Yeah, I said that, but don't worry about it. It's not important. And no he didn't say anything else." They stared at me. "I'm going to have to talk aren't I?" They both nodded. "Ugh! I really think it's better if I don't tell you." I looked at them again. They were still waiting. I felt my throat start to tighten as the anxiety gathered in my chest. I clenched my eyes tight to keep from crying but nonetheless the tears started to flow out of my eyes.

"Frankie, what's wrong!? Please let us help!" Ray said as I pushed past Mikey and ran out the door.

"Frank! Wait! Stop!" Someone called after me. I stopped and turned around just long enough to scream back at them.

"His happiness is more important than mine!" The tears blurred my vision as I turned and ran in the opposite direction of the tour bus.

****************************

"Frank! Where are you?!" I looked down from my hiding place. As soon as I had regained my composure and realized that I had no idea where I was going, I circled around the arena parking lot and climbed the side of the bus. That is where I am now. I am on the top of our tour bus, hiding from Mikey and Ray and I am sure I will soon be hiding from Bob and Gerard too. Looking down on Mikey and Ray, they seem to be trying to figure out how to deal with my disappearance and refusal to tell them why I am so upset.

"Crap! Mikey what do we do?! We have to have Frank back in a couple hours for the show!" Ray said.

"I know! What was that all about?! What did he mean 'his happiness is more important than mine'? This is all out of context. There is something Frank isn't telling us." Mikey answered back.

"Hmm... Maybe we should go talk to LynZ she might know something."

"Okay but why do you think she would know something?"

"2 AM talks are never for fun." Ray told him and Mikey seemed to remember that I had told them about talking to LynZ last night. They run off in the direction of the "Mindless Self Indulgence" tour bus.

Crap! I told LynZ about being in love with Gerard! I have to get there before they do!

*****************************

Ray's POV

"I really don't think I should tell you." LynZ said.

"LynZ we're trying to help Frank, not just pry into his personal life." I told her. I know they we are kind of prying but seeing Frank break down like that was horrible. I just really want to help him, even if that means the only thing I can do is be a shoulder to cry on.

"Ray, it's not my secret to tell! If he wanted you know, he would have told you!" She said.

"Maybe she's right Ray, it isn't right to force him to tell us." Mikey said. He was standing off to the side and slightly behind me.

"And you think it's right to let him suffer alone? There's something very wrong with him and we hav-" We heard a loud bang as someone in an obvious hurry slammed the bus door open.

"LynZ! You didn't tell them did you?!" Frank shouted as he stumbled through the door, not noticing that Ray and Mikey were already there. LynZ groaned, it seems she is stuck in the middle of our argument.

"No Frank, I haven't told them but I don't really want to be the keeper of this secret."

"I know! I'm sorry! Thank you for being accepting though. Especially since it's... well Gerard."

"This is just a mess Frank. You really should tell them."

"I can't hardly tell myself LynZ. It hurts to much, knowing that he's in pain and... I just can't! Okay?!" He says, obviously in war with himself.

"Frank, you can tell us anything! We won't judge you or Make fun of you. We just want to help you." He looks down as sobs start to wrack his body.

"Gerard needs help. He needs LynZ." He struggled to get out as he fell to his knees with his face in his hands. Mikey kneeled beside him. "Gerard is in pain and I wish I could be the one he needs. Just tell them LynZ. I can't say it." We look to LynZ who stares back at us. She gulps.

"Frank is in love with Gerard." My stomach drops as she says the words.


	5. Lie to Me

Ray's POV

I'm stunned into silence. I hear Mikey's sharp intake of breath when the truth comes out. He starts pacing the room before walking off the bus. I turn my head to see that he is pacing outside now. Frank is a mess. LynZ is holding his head in her lap as he cries quietly. LynZ. Why is she so nice? He's is in love with her fiance and she still cares enough about Frank to comfort him while he cries. I sigh in frustration. Usually I'm the one who knows what to do in bad situations.

"Frank. Come one. It's okay." I say grabbing his shoulder. He takes a moment to answer.

"It's not okay Ray! Gerard is suffering and I can't do anything to help him!" LynZ's phone rings and she excuses herself to the back lounge of the bus.

"Hey, we'll get through this Frank." I hug him and he clings to my chest. "What you said earlier about Gerard's happiness being more important than your own, that's not true. You know that right?" He shakes his head.

"I can't believe that Ray. I love him. I can't be happy until he is."

"I understand that Frank. I'm the same way with Crista and with all my family and friends. I want you all to be happy. You need to talk to Gerard. He's your best friend and I'm sure he'll understand. I'm not going to tell him anything and I'll make sure Mikey doesn't either." He seems to relax a little bit.

"I can't tell him Ray. It would mess everything up! I don't want to come between him and LynZ. She makes him happy." Just then, LynZ reenters the room. She has a few tears in her eyes.

"LynZ! Are you okay?" I exclaim.

"It's my sister." she says as her voice cracks. "She's having problems with her pregnancy. I have to go, she needs me." She says and cries into her hands. I get up and hug her.

"Are you going to tell Gerard?" I say in a quiet voice and she nods.

"I need to. We'll just have to postpone the wedding for a few weeks." I look over at Frank who is still crying. His face doesn't portray happiness but at least now he doesn't have to face Gerard right away. She drops her arms and exits the bus. Presumably to find Gerard.

I turn back to Frank who is now sniffling. I feel a pang of sadness and go to hug him again as Mikey reenters the bus. Frank looks over to him with an expression that looked something between scared and sad.

"Don't worry Frank. I'm not mad, just confused. I can't be mad at you for having feelings. I'm just having trouble thinking through this. I just wish the situation was easier. I didn't even know you were gay." Mikey said, relieving some of the tension in the room with his acceptance of Franks live for her brother. He still sounding like he was having trouble wrapping his head around the fact.

"I'm really sorry I didn't tell you guys. I didn't even know I was gay until I met Gerard. I thought it would be bad for the band if I told you guys how I feel." I can't believe he's head over heals for Gerard. All I can think about is the pain Frank has had to endure to keep this hidden. My mind flashes to all the stage gay Frank has initiated between himself and Gerard and I snicker. Frank looks at me surprised and hurt.

"Oh sorry" I say. "I was thinking about all the stage gay that I guess wasn't completely staged." That earns a big grin from Mikey and a deep blush from Frank. He grabs his cheeks and looks down embarrassed.

"I don't know what we're going to do!" Mikey exclaims after the moment had passed. "I can't let you be sad but I can't keep Gerard from being happy either. I won't tell him Frank but I think you should. He's your best friend and he doesn't even know that you're gay." Frank sighs shakily.

"I know. I just don't know how. Right now, I'm really just pissed off at him for pretending he's okay. I have even talked to him since I caught him last night." Frank says, calmed down now.

"Maybe you should just talk to him about that instead and see where it goes. Just tell him that if he opens up, you'll do the same." I say. "You don't have to tell him that you're in love with him but I think he at least deserves to know that his best friend is gay."

"You're probably right." Frank says after some hesitation. "I should tell him that at least. Will you guys tell Bob for me? I don't think I can handle that many difficult conversations in one day."

We agree to tell Bob. Frank's bound to have a long and difficult day. Talking about alcoholism, self harm, love confessions, as well as unintentionally coming out of the closet all in one day is probably the worst thing he's ever had to do. It's a recipe for the most stressful day Frank's ever had.

Frank's POV

  
I can feel the anxiety rising in my chest. Not just anxiety though. I am unbelievably mad. What the fuck is wrong with Gerard?! He fucking lied to me when he said he's okay. I can't believe I'm in love with that piece of shit! Why would he lie to me?! He knows I'm his best friend! He knows I would never deny him any sort of help. Especially when he's slipping back into fucking alcoholism and self harm! I feel a slight stab of fear in my stomach when I think about his old habits and how far he's come. I don't know why he would hide this from any of us. We've all seen him at his worst and he knows that any of us would do anything to keep it from getting that bad ever again. And fucking LynZ. He told me that she made him happy and I fucking believed him. If she made him happy, why did I have to find him cutting himself! The last time Gee did that was when he was on the verge of killing himself. That doesn't sound like a man who is "happy". I guess I don't know anything anymore.

I let the anger build up inside of me all day. After leaving the departing MSI bus, we slowly walked back to ours to lounge around before we get ready to perform. Gerard and Bob were already there. I could tell Gerard was disappointed at his wedding being postponed. We made sure he was alright before getting dressed in our costumes. I felt myself glaring daggers at him on more than one occasion.

We were finally ready and headed to the backstage area of the venue. I could see Mikey and ray throwing quick glances my way the whole time. We headed up to the stage for soundcheck and to set up the guitars and and mic's.

Mikey and Ray glanced at each other and followed Bob into the equipment area, presumably to explain my situation. As Gerard started warming up into the microphone, I finished tuning my guitar and then headed in the direction of the other guys.

When I reached them, Bob looked at me with a sad expression and threw his arm around my shoulders, ruffling my hair like a puppy.

"Sorry man" he said. "I hope this all works out for you. Does it feel good to be out of the closet?"

"Not really." I said honestly. "I kind of just feel as shitty as I did before. Honestly, I've been angry pretty much all day. Gerard lied to me when he said he was okay."

*later that night*

"Are you ready for this?!" Gerard screamed into the microphone. The crowd roared in approval. We had started off the night with the customary song called "The End". The crowd went wild when Gerard rose out of the hospital bed. After "The End" we went straight into "Dead!" and then the rest of the set was a mixture of songs off of Bullets, Revenge and Black Parade. As expected, I remained angry throughout the entire concert. Luckily, I was able to channel some of my angst into the music. I knew it was a bad idea to go into a hard conversation with angry thoughts so I tried to burn them off with my customary high energy performance.

Gerard didn't help my cause. He did his usually sexually provocative dances throughout the concert and moaned into the microphone a couple time. He did it for the crowd but it was still annoying when I already have to deal with his sexual appeal on a regular basis. It really rubbed me the wrong way when he started his sassy pouting act. He would dance toward me or his brother like he was a 21 year old girl going to the club. I think he knew I was still mad at him. He seemed to suck up to me the most, he even went so far as to give me a shout out.

"Over there on Rhythm Guitar is Frank fucking Iero, the best fucking Rhythm Guitarist on the whole god damn planet. Let me hear it if you love Frank Iero as much as I do." The crowd went wild and I saw Gerard wink out of the corner of his eye. I pretended not to notice but caught a pitying look from Mikey as I turned around.

Gerard was just trying to suck up. He knew I was still mad about him drinking and self harming. He didn't want me to tell anybody because he's ashamed and doesn't want to cause trouble. Well fuck that. It's too late anyway. Everybody already knows about it and I'm already fuming mad. I begin to accept that I'm going to be mad for the rest of the day. I guess it's fitting that we end the set with "I'm not okay" from the revenge album.

We tear into the song, me and Ray singing backup vocals. It's near impossible to hold in my anger now. We're getting close to the middle of the song when I get an idea. It's a bad idea but I'm going to do it anyway.

I hear Gerard call out; "But you really need to listen to me, because I'm telling you the truth, I mean this, I'm okay!" He turns to me waiting for my call out.

"Lie to me!" I scream out in response.   


	6. Confessions

Franks POV

"Sorry Gee, there's going to be alcohol. You probably shouldn't come." Mikey said to his brother as he, Ray and Bob made for the door. We had come back to shower on the bus after the show. Nobody had mentioned the elephant in the room. Gerard seemed to be dreading being alone with me.

"Oh okay. Have fun guys." Gerard said back, obviously disappointed. Mikey ignores him as he walks through the door, throwing an encouraging smile at me before leaving. I heard the door slam shut as silence filled the space between me and Gerard. He sighed.

"Okay spill it Frank." He said, surprising me. "What was that about?"

"You know damn well what that was about Gee."

"I haven't lied to you Frank, I don't know what you're talking about." His eyes betrayed him as they shifted to the side.

"Gerard stop playing games. Two days ago I caught you breaking your sobriety after promising me that you were okay. Last night I caught you slitting your wrists. I knew I promised I wouldn't tell anybody," his eyes went wide "but I had to. I'm not the only one who cares about you." he puts his head in his hands and elbows on his knees as he groans.

"You told them?" He says in a strained voice.

"Of course I did Gerard. They've seen you at your worst and no one wants it to get that bad again." He nods in acceptance.

"Were they mad at me?" he says as he looks up.

"Gee, we're not mad at you." I pause. "I was for a while. But I understand. Life's hard and I know you haven't always had an easy go at it but we've been through this before. I'm not going to let you drink your life away and I think you know that self harm won't stop the pain." I say in all honesty. He lets out a shaky sigh.

"I-I know Frank. I'm sorry. But I promise, I'm okay. I won't do it again."

"Jesus fucking christ Gerard! I fucking know for a fact that you're not okay! The last time you cut yourself, we could hardly keep you from killing yourself! Self harm isn't going to fix a damn thing and I'm definitely not going to lose you to that bullshit! Now fucking tell me what's wrong! The only way to fix a problem is to actually address it!" I all but yell at him and he winces.

"This is why they left, isn't it Frank?" he said plainly and looked at me with desperate eyes. I sigh in response and go to sit next to him on the couch.

"Yes, they knew I was going to talk to you. Now stop avoiding the question. The only way I can help you is if you let me." He looks down again.

"I don't know Frank. I don't think you can help me." I feel a pang of sadness as he throws the truth in my face again.

"Oh I get it. You just need LynZ. She definitely knows you better than me." I said in an angry and sarcastic voice. He looked slightly hurt.

"No Frank. I'm sorry. I lied about LynZ. She makes me happy but the pain doesn't go away. I only said that because I didn't you to worry about me." What was he saying?! How could he think that I wouldn't worry about him? I will always worry about him!

"Gerard... I will always worry about you." I say and pull him into a tight hug. I don't let go and after some time I can feel tears dripping onto my shoulder. He lets out a small sob.

"Thank you Frankie. Thank You. I hoped you would" He sobs the words and they pull at my heartstrings.

"Hey come on Gerard." I say as I rub his back. "I can tell you're hurting. Just tell me what's up." He takes a few seconds to answer me.

"I-I feel like a burden. I'm just some fuck up that can't do anything right. I make everyone worry and- and I'm a freak." He says as I sit in confusion, still holding him.

"Gerard you are none of those things. A freak? You're not a freak. You're Gerard and you are perfect. You are my best friend and I need you. Even if you were any of those things, you'd still be worth it." I squeeze him tighter and he clings to me.

"Frank, I really am a freak. I-I think I'm Bisexual." My mouth drops open. Gerard? Bisexual?

"Gerard! That's great!" I say a little too excitedly. He pulls back to look at me with a confused face. "That doesn't make you a freak! Nobody ever said you had to just like women!"

"But-"

"But what?! Literally, nobody is going to care Gee! Is this really the reason you're upset?"

"I-I just thought everybody would be mad. I mean, I already have LynZ and I feel like it would be a betrayal to find out that I also like guys just when we're about to get married."

"Gee, you can't hold back your sexuality. LynZ should be happy that you finally know who you are!" He gets a small smile on his face.

"I guess so. Thank you Frank. I don't know what I would do without you." he sighs and leans back into the couch. I smile and do the same.

" You know something Gee? Something I've never told anybody?" I guess I haven't technically told anybody, even though LynZ, Mikey, Ray and Bob already know. "I'm Gay"

"What?!" He sits up straight and stares at me with his mouth hanging open. "Frank! That's great! He hugs me and I giggle.

"Thanks Gee!" I smile broadly. "It feels good to be out."

"Same" he says and I can feel him smile into my shoulder.

"I hope you feel better now Gee. You are so important to all of us and you are definitely not the only one who's been hiding their sexuality." He squeezed me harder. It felt good to be in his arms. He nods and I smile. "Good! Now let's watch a movie!

I smile down at the sleeping form of Gerard who is leaned against my shoulder. The movie has been over for a while but I don't want to wake him. He looks so beautiful. I feel sleep pulling at my eyelids and settle in for the night. The guys still haven't come back.

"I love you Gee." I whisper as I drift off.

"I love you too Frankie." is the last thing I hear before sleep takes me.

Wait! What?!


	7. Rainbow Pancakes

Ray's POV

We stumbled up the tour bus stairs in a drunken stupor, all of us giggling but reminding each other to keep quiet. Gerard and Frank were probably sleeping.

We walked through the doorway and lost our composure in a silent fit of giggles as we saw that Frank and Gerard were snuggled up together on the couch! Mikey took his Phone out of his pocket and started snapping pictures of the two sleeping together. He giggled and I could see the huge grin across his face. Mikey never passed up some good blackmail on his brother!

I laughed some more before making my way to my bunk and passing out, Bob and Mikey not far behind me.

Frank's POV

I awoke at about 9 AM to the sound of someone rustling around the kitchen. I was slumped to the side of the couch, previously having been leaned against Gerard. I became uncomfortable in my current position and recalled shifting to laying down before I drifted off to sleep again. I few minutes later I awoke fully and observed someone standing by the sink, a bowl in the crook of his arm and a whisk in the other hand.

"Hey Frankie! Wake up!" Gerard called over to me and I smiled slightly.

"What are you doing Gee? Making pancakes?" I asked him.

"Yep! I thought it would be nice to have a real breakfast today! I usually just stick to coffee!" I giggle, recalling Gee's addiction to coffee. "Of course we're having that to." he says with a smirk. I drag myself off the couch and into the kitchen to get a mug and am surprised when I look down at Gerard's progress.

"Rainbow! Sweet!" He laughs at me.

"Yeah, I'm... gonna come out to the rest of the guys. I thought this was as good a way as any!" he laughs nervously.

"Thats awesome Gee! Don't be worried! Nobody here is a homophobe!" I say in all honesty, recalling my own experience. He smiles and blushes. I smile back at him as he wraps his arms around me. It shocks me at first but then I recall our conversation last night and how he felt about my acceptance of his sexuality.

"Thank you Frankie. I really love you." he whispers it into my neck, I can feel his hot breath, making me think things I shouldn't be thinking. My breath hitches in my throat.

"I love you too Gee." I say, separating myself from him to prevent myself from doing anything I knew I would regret.

He doesn't let go of my shoulders but stares down into my eyes. There's an emotion there that I can't quite pin point. Sadness? Regret? Lust? I'm so busy pondering that I don't notice that we have been staring at each other for longer than necessary, nor did I notice that our faces had grown dangerously close. I could feel my heart beating at the closeness. His eyes fluttered shut as he leaned down, connecting our lips.

Mikey's POV

I leaned out of my bunk at the mention of pancakes and was surprised as the scene that was taking place in our kitchen. Gee and Frank making out!!! I almost couldn't contain my excitement! Of course I knew about Frank being Gay but I had only had my suspicions about Gerard. The stage gay that Gerard went along with had been the first clue.

I recalled walking in last night and seeing the pair of them snuggled up on the couch together. That had almost confirmed my brothers bisexuality but now I could be certain!

I contemplated jumping out of my bunk and ambushing them but thought better of it. What was really going on here? Had Frank told Gerard about his feelings for him? What about LynZ?

Shit! This might be bad!

Frank's POV

I groaned into his mouth as my arms wrapped around his waist. It felt so good to finally be kissing him again. I felt one of his hands travel from my shoulder up to my hair, tangling itself. I let my hand drop down a little to squeeze at his butt, he made a squeaking sound as I grabbed at him. I used the opportunity to slip my tongue into his mouth, he yielded to my dominance easy enough.

I deepened the kiss but I could feel Gerard's reluctance, something I hadn't considered before. I immediately felt guilty, knowing he was committed to someone else. I hurriedly broke away. Slowing my breathing, I looked up at him. He also, was out of breath.

"Gee..." I said with worry in my voice. "What was that? What about LynZ?" He looked away.

"I- I don't know. I'm sorry Frank. I shouldn't have done that. I need some time. I'm just really confused. I don't know what I want." My throat tightened up, knowing this was partly my fault. I shouldn't have let him kiss me. That's not what friend's do to their engaged friends. I felt the slight sting of tears pulling at the corners of my eyes. I wanted to cry in self pity. I know he doesn't love me. I manage to fight back the tears.

"You're right. I'm sorry Gee. We shouldn't have done that. You're engaged. I don't want to take advantage of you or LynZ."

"Don't worry about it Frank. It was my fault." he said with a sigh as he turned back to his pancakes. I brushed off his apology, knowing he would never accept my partial fault.

"Do you want some help?" I asked him, hoping we could get past this incident with as little awkwardness as possible.

"Um... sure! Are you going to come out too?" I contemplated his question carefully. They all already knew I was Gay. Gerard had been the last to know but I had also told him that I had never told anybody. While that small fact was true, Ray and Mikey had found out when LynZ told them. They had told Bob, so yes, I had never told anybody but that didn't mean that nobody knew. I guess I would have to deal with this sooner or later anyways. I might as well "come out" with Gerard and hope they played along. I don't think that Gerard needs to know about the events of the previous two days.

"Um, sure Gee. I may as well. It's no use hiding it now." he giggled and started dripping food coloring into the different bowls of pancake batter. When the batter was ready, we poured it onto the frying pan, the first color was red and then we poured the orange on top, creating a ripple effect. We continued with the colors until each pancake looked like a rainbow.

"Well, they look pretty damn gay, Frankie." I giggled at his joke and then turned toward the bunk room, ready to start waking everybody up. "Time for breakfast guys!" I shouted at them as I pulled the bunk curtains to the side. "We made pancakes!" They all sleepily rolled out of bed, groaning their support of our breakfast choice. Once everybody had sat down at the table, we placed the stack of pancakes in the middle and watched for a reaction. Grins across both our faces as all three heads turned toward us.

"These look pretty damn gay!" Bob said laughing, "are you two trying to tell us something?" he laughed again and I saw Ray and Mikey trying to hide their smiles.

"Well in my case they happen to be bisexual." Gerard said and blushed, hiding his eyes.

"Mine are gay." I said in support of Gerard. By now they were all smiling from ear to ear, cheering and getting up from the table to hug us.

"I was wondering when you'd come out Gee!" Mikey said, surprising us all he hugged his brother as tight as he could.

"Mikey! You knew?! How?!"

"I'm your brother dumb ass! Of course I knew!" He laughed and kissed Gee in the cheek.

"I love you Mikey, thanks for being okay with this!" Gee hugged him back

"Frank, you were harder to guess but it seems more obvious now that we know!" he hugged me as well. Ray hugged me next and whispered in my ear.  
"Nice going man, is that what's been bothering him?" I nodded in affirmation as Ray giggled and ruffled my hair.

"I hope you guys know this doesn't change anything, right?" Bob said as he pulled me and Gerard into a group hug. "We're all the same people and we're all still best friends!" Everybody nodded their agreement as we sat down to our colorful pancakes, laughing and conversing as usual.

I couldn't help but think that Bob's words would prove to be untrue. What would happen between me and Gerard? 


	8. I'd Never Hurt You

 

Mikey’s POV

“I’m going to go help the movers.” Frank said “I don’t want my gear jostled around too much” It wasn’t an uncommon thing for him to do. The movers are great and we’re thankful to have them but sometimes they aren’t aware of the breakable items. It was also a way for Frank to escape the awkwardness between him and Gerard. The other guys don’t seem to notice but I know more than them. They are avoiding eye contact.

“Good idea, I’ll come too.” I tell him, not just because of the gear but I need to talk to him away from the others. We walk off the bus and are met by a couple squealing fans, held back by Brian, our manager. I hear Frank giggle as Brian struggles to keep them far enough away from us.

 “I was just about to ask a few of you to come out! Frank! Mikey! Will you please come sign these real quick?! I need to get these kids out of here. We can’t be responsible for anybody injured during haul in!” Brian says the last part mostly to warn the fans. We shrug and take a deep breath, bracing ourselves for the many hugs and camera flashes that are to come.

“Frankie! Are you gay for Gerard?!” a squealing 12-year-old yells at Frank.

“No way! We just pretend to keep the homophobes away!” Frank says with a giggle. The girl looks disappointed but seems happier once we sign her copy of three cheers. We pose for a couple pictures before the fans are herded away, back to the front of the building.

“Thanks Guys!” Brian yells at us as he walks away. We wave at him as we walk in the opposite direction. I giggle and Frank gives me a weird look.

 “Don’t look at me like that! I know you lied to that girl!”

 “Of course I lied to her! Do you know what would happen if they knew I was gay?! They’d assume me and Gerard are together!” Frank said.

 “Are you not? I saw you guys this morn-” He cuts me off.

 “What?! How?!”

 “Calm down. I can’t say I’m surprised. You told him you love him?” Frank sighs before answering.

 “I-I don’t know exactly. It was really weird. We were just watching a movie and I thought he had fallen asleep. I was about to do the same and I just whispered it, I don’t know why I thought it was a good idea but I could have sworn he was asleep! I just whispered it and he-”

 “What did he do Frank?” Frank looked at me with a smidge of panic in his eyes.

 “He said it back!”

 “Holy shit man!” I whispered and ran a hand through my hair.

 “I know! I don’t know what to do! He kissed me and now I’m just confused! He’s engaged but he said he loves me! Then he said he needed time to decide!” Frank seems to be in genuine distress now, pacing with his eyes down cast and both hands up to the sides of his face.

“Frank, calm down! It’s okay! I’ll try and talk to him! He needs to be honest with you and LynZ.”

“He’s not going to pick me Mikey! If he was going to he would have done it by now! We’ve been best friends for years!” I put both hands on his shoulders to stop his pacing.

“Frank, it’ll be fine! I’m going to talk to him okay! He may not have been with you all this time because he thought you were straight! You thought he was straight!” He looks me in the eyes and I can see him relax a bit. He nods.

“Y-you’re right Mikey, I’m sorry for freaking out.” I hug his small frame.

“It’s okay Frank. I’m not going to let him hurt you.”

Frank’s POV

 I hear the opening chords to You Know What They Do To Guys Like Us In Prison and a small smile creeps across my face. This is the notorious stage gay song! The crowd is going wild, obviously in anticipation. They’re expecting a show. Is it really appropriate? Probably not but the only people who know it’s not exactly staged are the other band members.

 He struts around, knowing I won’t be able to resist. I come up beside him, rubbing my sweaty hair against his shoulder, I lick a stripe up his face and breath on his neck. I feel my boner straining against my jeans. Thank God, I have a guitar to cover it with. I can feel his knees going weak and he drops down to his knees, giving me permission to proceed with my “act”. It wasn’t an act to us but that’s what the fans knew it to be.

 I place a hand in the opposite side of his head and press it against my crotch. I moan, nobody can hear it thankfully. It’s too loud in here. Gerard wraps his arm around my legs, keeping me from leaving. I moan and hump his head a few more times before yanking him to his feet and sloppily making out with him. He returns it, just as turned on as I am. I break away from him, leaving a string of spit between us.

 I spend the rest of the concert going crazy, trying to lose enough energy before it’s over. I manage to lose the boner by distracting myself with the music. We end the set with Helena and run off stage to our crew cheering and high fiving us. We make it back to our dressing room where we take turns taking showers. We are lucky enough to have a shower on the bus but it’s tiny, has no water pressure, and we can only use it when the venue is hooked up to water and sewer. Ray, Bob and Mikey go first. After showering, they make their way back to the bus. Mikey throws a wink at me as he leaves, knowing that me and Gee would be alone.

 I’m next in the shower, I go into the bathroom and strip down, throwing my clothes in a pile by the door. I hang a towel over the shower rod and climb in. I turn the hot water up all the way and enjoy the slight sting in brings to my already bright red skin. I enjoy the heated bliss and take my time, knowing it could be a while until I get to use an actual shower again. Tour is definitely not the place for personal hygiene. I hear a door creak outside and call out.

“Gee, is that you? What are you doing?” I hear his distinctive giggle outside the shower curtain. “What are you doing?” I ask him again. He doesn’t answer but I see his hand reach around the curtain, pulling it aside. No big deal, he’s seen me naked before. I turn around to turn the shower off and keep my back to him.

“Frankie, don’t tell me that little act didn’t turn you on.” I freeze. I was hoping this conversation wouldn’t come up.

“Gee... “I trail off. “Don’t tease me. I know you don’t want me. I’m not just going to let you play with me.” I say and cast my eyes downward. There’s a moment of silence as I climb out of the shower and wrap my towel around my waist. My back is still turned to him but I hear some rustling around and assume he’s getting undressed to shower. I’m about to leave the bathroom when Gerard comes up behind me, breathing heavily onto my neck. I can feel the bare skin of his chest against my back.

 “I want you Frankie. Not just now. Forever.” he whispers into my ear. I moan and turn around, pulling his mouth onto mine.

 


	9. I'm So Dirty Babe

Frank’s POV

 

“Gee…” I moan into his mouth, already feeling like my knees would give way and I would fall to the ground. I clung to him for support. He moves his head down to my neck, breathing heavily. He licks a stripe up my neck, over my tattoo.

“Frankie… I love your tattoos. They’re so sexy.” He whispers the last part into my ear, sending shivers down my spine. He grins, knowing the affect he has on me. Holding me at arms length with his hands on my hips, he looks down my torso to the twin swallows tattooed there. His thumbs trace their shape. “You know Frankie… you never told me what these mean.” He looks into my eyes waiting for an answer I wasn't sure I could give in any intelligible sense. He smirks, knowing the truth. He moves his mouth to my throat, sucking and leaving hickies that I’m sure would have to be explained to onlookers later on. “That’s okay. I think I know what they mean anyway.” He smirks into my neck as I moan out his name over and over again.

He leads me out of the bathroom and to the couch in our now abandoned dressing room. Pushing me down, he straddles my hips. His kissing and sucking travels down my chest to the afore mentioned swallow tattoos. By now, I’m shaking in anticipation and moan dirtily as he looks up at me. He kisses the swallows as my fully hard cock lays against the side of his face.

“So beautiful Frankie… I love seeing you like this. A sloppy mess, moaning out my name.” he practically moans himself. I sit up on the couch and grab a handful of his hair, pulling his lips to mine.

“You’re the dirty whore who did it to me.” I say and push him down on the couch. I’m in control this time. “So fucking hot Gee…” I say as I run my hands down his chest. “I love your bare skin. You don’t have any tattoos, it’s so different than mine.” I place my hands on either side of his head and lean down to kiss him. I place kisses and hickeys on his neck, the same way he had done to me. “Moan for me slut” I tease him. He moans out in response, making my cock twitch and leak precum. I grind up against him, making him moan even louder.

“Frankie… let me suck you off.” I groan at the thought of Gerard on his knees, looking up at me as I fuck his mouth. He sits up and I climb off him. He slides off the couch and sinks to his knees, wrapping his arm around one of my legs and leaves a hickey on my upper thigh, making me moan. He licks a stripe up my length, earning more moans from me. His hand wraps around the base of my cock as he takes me into his mouth. I feel the head hit the back of his throat, surprisingly he doesn’t gag. He starts bobbing his head up and down while working on the base of my cock with his hand. I moan and lightly thrust into his mouth. He swirls his tongue around the head.

“This is definitely not the first time you’ve done this Gee.” I smirk as he looks up at me and smiles around the dick in his mouth. He pulls off.

“Those crazy college years weren’t wasted Frankie.”  He giggles and I pull him to his feet, crashing my lips to his and kissing him furiously. As we make out, my hand travels down his chest and grips his cock, jerking him off.

“Show me what else you learned in college Gee.” I grin and he looks down at my face. “I want you to fuck me.” I feel him shiver and he nods.

“Get on the couch. Do you want it from behind or missionary?” I consider his question, thinking about how I want both but realizing I have to pick one. We won’t last long enough for both.

“Missionary, I want to see your face when you cum in my ass.” He shivers again and I know I made the right choice. I lay down and he positions himself between my legs with my calves over his shoulders. His breath is coming in gasps as he attempts to control himself. He reaches up and offers me two of his fingers to suck. I realize what he means to do I silently thank him for it. I take his fingers into my mouth and coat them in spit. When they are sufficiently lubed, he pulls them out and glances up at me, asking permission to proceed.

“Do it Gee!” I say in encouragement. He nods and slides a finger in. I gasp and squirm a bit, trying to get comfortable. He waits patiently and I nod when I’m ready for a second finger. He slides it in slowly, holding my hips down with the other hand. I moan when he starts to scissor, enjoying the stretch. “Please Gee!” I moan. “I want you to fuck me!” As if in response, he pulls his fingers out and spit sn his hand, rubbing along his length.

“Are you ready Frankie? Let me know if it gets to be too much.” He says as he positions his cock at my entrance. I moan out his name as he slowly pushes the head in. He continues pushing in. When he finally bottoms out, he lets out a stream of curses and moans. “Fuck, Frankie. You’re so tight.” He says as he starts to thrust in and out. I’m already a moaning mess. His thrusts become faster as he sets a rhythm, hitting my prostate with each thrust.

“Gee…” I moan. “So good… right there! Don’t stop!” He continues thrusting but his pace soon falters and I can tell he’s getting close. He tries to slow down and be gentle, much to my dissatisfaction. “Gee, I can tell you’re holding back. Just fuck me like you need it! Take what you need!” He moans at my words.

“I need you Frankie! So fucking hot!” He says and his pace picks up again, he almost collapses as he lets his body take over and fucks me as hard as he can. He curses and moans my name as he abuses my prostate, losing complete control. “I’m so close Frankie.” He moans.

“Me too, Gee! Scream my name as you cum! I want to hear it!” I say as he wraps one hand up in my hair and jacks me off with the other. It only takes a few pumps before I’m cuming into his hand and yelling out his name. He thrust into me a few me a few more times before cuming in my ass.

“Frankie!” He screams and his face contorts into pure bliss. He rides out his orgasm before pulling out. And collapsing onto me, a sweaty mess. I nibble on his ear. “Shit, Frankie. That’s the best sex I’ve ever had.” I giggle at the compliment.

“I love you too baby.” I say and he giggles. “We better clean up and get back to the bus… I’m sure the guys are wondering what happened to us.”

-

We take a quick shower together before pulling our clothes back on and speed walking back to the bus, wondering if we’re going to have to explain anything to our bandmates. I’m glad it’s dark, nobody can see the hickeys covering both our necks.

Once we make it across the parking lot, we are surprised to see Bob sitting on the curb smoking a cigarette.

“What going on Bob, why are you out here alone?” Gerard asks him. Bob hesitates to answer. “Are Mikey and Ray alright?” Gerard asks suspicious.

“Yeah. They’re alright.” he says but then adds to his statement. “But Gee, _You_ might not be alright when you figure out what they’re doing in there and why I’m out here alone.” We look at Bob, trying to figure out what he means by that. I make for the door but stop when Bob gets a panicked look on his face.

“Bob, just tell us what you mean! It can’t be that bad can it?!” I say to him and he places his head in his hands.

“Just be quiet and listen and I think you’ll be able to figure it out yourself!” he snaps at me. Taking his advice, I put my ear against the door. Gerard follows my example.

“Oh, Mikey! Fuck yeah!” We hear Ray’s unmistakable voice from inside the bus. Both our mouths drop open in disbelief. I break down in a fit of giggles as Gerard covers his ears and goes to sit next to Bob on the curb.

“Oh my God!” Gerard says, still hardly believing what he just heard. I sit next to him and throw my arm around his shoulders, still giggling.

“Well, Gee, At least we won’t be the butt of _all_ the jokes tomorrow morning.” I laugh some more when Bob gives us a questioning look.  


End file.
